I've never seen a system so utterly foolish!

In the early morning, inside an apartment room that looked utterly ordinary.

After casually taking a bite from the hamburger on the table, the boy with dead-fish eyes flopped lazily back onto his bed, absentmindedly watching the television screen.

“Hmm... I’ve pretty much finished absorbing the memories of this body. No problem with the language now.”

His name was Jos Quinn. Though the name sounded a bit odd, it was still better than his old friend, who had the unfortunate name Mario.

Originally, Jos’s English scores had never surpassed thirty out of a hundred, but now he could understand American television shows without subtitles, effortlessly and completely.

The reason for all this was, without a doubt, because after crossing over, he had inherited the memories of this body’s original owner—a person who, whether coincidentally or otherwise, was also called “Jos.”

Nodding in satisfaction, Jos switched the television to a metal music channel and leaned back on the bed.

It had been over a week since he arrived in this world, and Jos had more or less adapted to his new life here, without any real discomfort.

After all, his health had never been good in his previous life. Born with a congenital heart defect, who knew what went wrong, but one day his legs just twitched and that was the end of him.

To strengthen his weak body, Jos had put in a fair amount of effort, working out regularly and learning some martial arts.

The results were quite significant—so much so that he managed to train himself to death.

Perhaps it was because he’d known since childhood that he didn’t have long to live, but on the day of his eighteenth birthday, when he finally died, Jos felt surprisingly little.

Now, having crossed over and living again, with the constant pain of his heart finally gone, he actually felt he should celebrate.

Yet Jos wasn’t particularly happy. Instead, he spent each day troubled and anxious.

Why? Because this world was the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

Yes, that world where, on average, three or four superheroes and supervillains would cause chaos every day, and every incident ranged from a building being destroyed to the entire planet being in peril.

Never mind the infamous purple snapper who could wipe out half the universe; for an ordinary person like Jos, every such incident meant mass casualties among people just like him.

Just in the few days since he arrived, Jos had already seen three major incidents on the news. Although the superheroes ultimately resolved them, the death toll among civilians was still tragic.

Even though these events had occurred far from Jos and hadn’t affected his life directly, they had instilled in him a profound sense of crisis.

Luck was a fickle thing, and absolutely nothing to rely upon in a world crawling with monsters and the strong outnumbering the weak. Even if he ran to the ends of the earth, the purple titan’s snap could still find him.

So, if he wanted to live in peace, the only way was to become stronger.

Compared to anything else, this was the one goal Jos was absolutely clear about, and he was already putting it into practice.

Most people might be confused about how to get stronger—especially those without superpowers, who couldn’t possibly imagine battling godlike monsters.

But as a transmigrant, there was always a special benefit, wasn’t there?

Only, whenever Jos thought of the cheat he’d brought along, his hope for this world diminished further.

As everyone knows, transmigrators usually get a cheat ability, often tied to whatever they were doing before they crossed over. If they’d been watching anime, perhaps they’d get ninja arts or a devil fruit; gamers might get swordmaster skills or a card-drawing system.

Magic, immortality, even advanced mecha—these were the sorts of powerful and fitting abilities that became the transmigrator’s lifeline.

But what had Jos been doing before he crossed over?

He’d been goofing around in a chat group, sending silly memes back and forth with equally silly online friends.

So, he ended up with the “Courting Death System.”

Yes, a system whose name was as blunt and foolish as it sounded.

And its effects matched perfectly—both idiotic and dangerous.

For instance, Jos’s first task was to dance the Little Swan ballet in the middle of the busiest rush hour traffic, finishing off with a moonwalk.

After agonizing over it for an entire day, Jos finally managed to complete the task. He was nearly beaten up by a mob of furious drivers but escaped in the nick of time, earning his first system reward: “Master of Time.”

The effect? Jos could now instantly know the precise time to the second in every time zone in the world.

Congratulations, indeed. At least he’d never need to buy a watch again.

As for his second task, he was required to approach a gigantic, muscular, bearded black man—whose arm was thicker than Jos’s thigh—and ask if he was interested in spending a romantic evening together.

Jos had assumed the worst that would happen was a beating, and that he’d only need to run after asking. He’d even carefully observed the nearby police patrol routes, planning to lead his pursuer that way and let the cops handle him if necessary.

But to his bewilderment, the man actually agreed.

He. Actually. Agreed.

Jos discovered, at that moment, that his running speed was even faster than when he’d escaped the furious drivers the day before.

If the man had caught him, given their size difference, Jos feared he’d be swallowed whole—and losing his innocence would be the least of his worries.

In the end, Jos managed, by sheer luck, to escape once again, but the searing pain in his leg muscles had plagued him ever since. That was why he was still lying lazily in bed.

And the reward?

Oh, this time it was actually kind of powerful. According to the description, it was basically the same as Mystique’s ability in the Marvel world.

“Name: Power of the Housefly Bro
Rarity: N
Effect: When you say that specific line, you can generate 300% more rage in your target.”

Jos didn’t know what to say anymore. He had utterly lost hope in his ridiculous system.

The tasks, while not impossible, were deadly in their own way.

But compared to these suicidal missions, the real problem lay in the rewards.

“What the hell am I supposed to do with these abilities?!”

Alas, no one could answer Jos’s question. All he could do was take another angry bite of his hamburger and turn his attention to the system panel.

There, one last ability lay quietly.

“Name: Stand with Your Back to the River
Rarity: R
Effect: Just as the name suggests, you can stand with your back to the river.”

And that was it. Those were the only words.

He’d been in this world for nearly two weeks, completed three tasks, and obtained three abilities.

And of these, the most useful was that damn Master of Time.